This is six.

My youngest just turned 6.

She was the child who was never meant to be after doctors said she probably never could be. She certainly wasn't planned. She was supposed to be the boy her brother was hoping for. She helped mend a broken marriage that needed her. She was the missing piece in a now puzzle of four kids.
She made us a family of six - until we weren't anymore. She was the last bit of legacy created with a man taken too soon from me. 

I am trying to heed the warnings of those seasoned moms who keep telling me, "enjoy it, it goes fast." So I look at her, watch her play and most days find myself squeezing her so tightly she can't wriggle free. I'm trying to keep her this way. I'm begging time to let 6 stay just a little bit longer.

Because 6 is letting mommy hold you on her lap even though you are getting too big.
6 is dragging Corduroy the teddy bear around everywhere you go.

6 is giggles.
6 is delighting in notes from the Tooth Fairy.
6 is believing in so much beauty and loveliness in the world.
6 is worried about ghosts and hides her eyes under blankets at the scary parts.
6 is happy with Goldfish snacks and peanut butter sandwiches.
6 is writing your Js backwards

6 can be whiny.
6 can be endless chatter.

6 is laying in the grass seeing shapes in the clouds.
6 isn't grossed out picking up roly poly bugs.
6 is sleeping with pink dollie every night.
6 is innocent bliss.

But no matter how tightly you hold, 6 will never stay.

This blog was originally posted Aug. 7, 2018 here at Her View From Home.


  1. Curious why you don't say 'our youngest'.....? So many many divorced women refer to their children as 'my____". Your sweet babies are and always will be the product of your marriage of hearts forever. Not the same as divorce at all.

    1. Hey anonymous. I will assume you haven't read a word of my blog. Especially if this is what you took from this piece. I am not divorced. My husband died from cancer two years ago. So I say MY because I'm the one parent left. She's mine because her daddy is dead.


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